The things I cart home on the train.

Vehicleless and materialistic, I've carted a lot of weird/cumbersome objects back to my apartment via public transport. These include (but are not limited to) 5 rusty metal signs with painted numbers (the kind that servos use to advertise the price of petrol), a 2 m tall carved aboriginal sculpture of a mimih spirit, a giant letter 't' made out of perspex, and a grass tree. Last Friday, however, took the cake for the most bizarre thing I've ever transported home by train/tram: a huge New Guinea gable mask circa 1940s by a tribe of headhunters/cannibals from the mid-Sepik river. I got it from my favourite shop in Melbourne, Tarlo and Graham, on Chapple street. The sales lady discreetly wrapped the mask in a huge bed sheet which I dragged to Windsor station to wait for the train. I then had to haul it out of Flinders street station to board a tram back to the apartment. The bloody thing weighed an absolute tonne and I almost had it flying out of my arms when the tram driver braked suddenly somewhere near the Melb Aquarium. Eventually, I hauled it back to the apartment and my hands couldn't stop shaking from the weight (must get back to the gym). Next big decision...where the bloody hell am I going to put it? Nate doesn't want it anywhere in side the bedroom...evidently he finds it creepy.